Chapter -1: First Conversation

There are always many feelings that a person cannot express in words and one of those is the FIRST CRUSH of one's life. It can happen at any age, any time and any place irrespective of caste, religion or social boundaries.

This is a story of the first crush of my life. Yes, I have been through this phase of life. This happened when I was in class 11 and like everyone I was also crushed between school and coaching running after a dream to crack JEE, but getting my ass kicked from the pressure of this society, family and mainly from competition between people whom we call friends. The coaching classes are where I met this girl, "The first crush of my life". I still remember everything as if it were yesterday. She wore red shirt and black jeans, with a smile so beautiful that it seemed like she was the only one for me. She was standing right in front of me talking to one of the teachers and to my horror I noticed a guy standing right next to her giggling and laughing. That day, maybe for the first time ever, I prayed so hard to God to let him be a brother of hers and that she is single. Finally my prayers came true when I got to know from the conversation between her and the teacher that he was her brother. I breathed a sign of relief and smiled to myself.

Everyday after school I used to be jump in joy as I will get to see her but things weren't going as I had imagined. None of the scenarios were at least like a mini version of Karan Johar's movie. So once I finally mustered courage to talk to her but I felt so nervous as if my life depended on it. I started planning conversations in my head and finally went with the classic textbook method "ask for her coaching notes", which as expected didn't go well as we received printed notes the very evening for that day. Damn my luck ! Why is this so hard ? The following day, I again prepared myself with another excuse to ask if she had an extra pen so that I can borrow it. I was not sure whether if would work or not but I made my mind up that I got to have a conversation with her no matter what ! This failed as well. But finally we did have a conversation after a few days, it was her who started it, but it was a lifetime achievement for me. Though our conversation was very short I was happy it finally happened - she asked for my notes, to check with hers from the previous class and I sat there looking at other people feeling so proud of myself that she talked to only me even though there were other students present there .

That day I really thought hard - Was it love? Was I in love with her ? or Was it just an attraction or infatuation towards opposite gender? There was one another possibility, it was the first time that I saw someone so beautiful that I might have just wanted her to be a part of my life. Even though I couldn't sleep that night, I was damn sure she was the first crush of my life.

-- Srivastav.